Category Archives: Mentoring

According To Your Bend

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On our Saturday evening Bible Study, we have been watching the videos from the Walking the Text Teaching Series with Brad Gray. In one of the recent videos, Brad Gray taught from Prov. 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” He brought out some interesting points in the lesson that I want to share with you.

First, Gray clarified a possible misconception about Proverbs that many people may have. He mentioned that Proverbs are not promises. Instead, they are wisdom statements that, if we follow them, we can expect a certain outcome, but we cannot guarantee they will happen. For instance, if we are wise and follow God’s commandments (instructions), we should experience peace, blessings, and a good life. If, however, we are foolish, lazy, or mean, we can expect a life that is not so pleasant or blessed. The Proverbs are just good advice that directs us to be wise in the decisions we make and not foolish.

This is also true with this proverb about training our children. I have heard many people claim this as a promise. If we train our sons or daughters in the things of God, even if they stray from the Lord, we have the promise that our child will one day return to God. However, as mentioned above, this is a wisdom statement, not a promise. It is not something that we can stand on as a guarantee.

However, Gray did provide a way of understanding this proverb that will help us apply it to our lives more effectively. He mentioned two levels of interpretation of the proverb. The first level is a general application. This is the overall goal of teaching all our children the ways of God: teaching them about His love, how to understand His grace and salvation, teaching them how to read and study the Bible, and how to pray. If we are faithful in leading them into a relationship with Jesus Christ through our teaching and our example, there is a good chance that they will not stray from that path.

The second level of interpretation Gray mentions comes from a closer look at the phrase, “in the way he should go” (emphasis mine). The Hebrew word for “way” means manner, road, conduct, or course. The phrase, then, could be translated as “train up a child according to his manner or course”. I’ve even heard it stated that we should train a child “according to his bend”, i.e., the way he “leans” or is inclined based upon his character or personality.

The point Gray is making is that each child is different. Each one has his own personality, giftings, talents, and ways in which he responds to correction or instruction. Therefore, even though there is a general direction we want all our children to take regarding the things of God, we must understand the differences of each child and make the adjustments necessary to fit their individual needs.

It requires a lot more work, but it is important that we realize that a “cookie-cutter” method of training our children does not work. Each child will respond to the gospel message and God’s love and correction in different ways. They will worship the Lord differently, they will understand Scripture differently, and they will express their love and service to the Lord differently. As parents, we must take the time to understand each child’s personality and character and adjust our training to fit the path that they are walking as they follow Jesus.

In our discussion about the lesson, our Bible Study group mentioned that this would be a good concept to remember when dealing with other members of the Body of Christ. It is important to recognize that we are all different. Our personalities, character, and giftings will influence how we respond to God. Some can be more emotional in their worship and prayer time, while others are more reserved. Some are deep thinkers and love to delve into the difficult aspects of theology while others are not. Some are more spiritually mature while others are not as far along in their walk with the Lord. And some appear to be more in tune with the spirit realm than others.

The point is that we are all different and we are all at different levels in our walk with the Lord. If we could fully understand this and apply it to our relationships with our brothers and sisters in the Lord, it might help us extend more grace and mercy towards each other—and maybe even help avoid conflicts in the church.

If you would like to watch Brad Gray’s teaching on Proverbs 22:6, follow the link below to Walking the Text Teaching Series Episode #75.

Episode 075 – Everyone’s Unique Path

Sharpen Your Blade

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The book of Hebrews was possibly written prior to the destruction of Jerusalem when Nero was persecuting the Christians. Because of the persecution, some Jewish converts were tempted to revert to Judaism, therefore, the book’s author (possibly Barnabas or Apollos) wrote to encourage the Jewish believers to remain strong in their faith in Christ.

Throughout the book, the author emphasizes the superiority of Christ to the ancient prophets, angels, Moses, as well as the priests and Old Testament sacrifices. He added that Christ was the full and final revelation of God and that all the Old Testament prophecies and promises were fulfilled in Him. Therefore, the author warns them that there is no returning to the previous Old Testament sacrificial system for the atonement of sins since it had been superseded by the death, resurrection, and ascension of Jesus Christ.

During his discussion on the priesthood of Jesus Christ, the author makes an interesting statement at the end of chapter five. He states that there was much more he wanted to say about this, but he couldn’t because they would not understand it. He said that they were “dull of hearing” (Heb. 5:11 ESV). The word dull means lazy, sluggish, or listless. Other translations say, “because you no longer try to understand” (NIV), or “you are spiritually dull and don’t seem to listen” (NLT). In other words, they were not putting forth much effort to grow spiritually or learn to discern the voice of God.

 Consequently, when they should be mentoring others, they themselves were still children requiring spiritual milk (Heb. 5:12) and were unskilled, i.e., without experience, or ignorant in discerning the word of God (Heb. 5:13). The author adds that a mature believer can distinguish between good and evil because they have trained themselves by constant use of the Word of God (Heb. 5:14). They make it a habit of listening to the voice of God and putting His Word into practice in their lives.

The picture that comes to my mind as a way of illustrating the two is a child playing with a dull wooden sword compared to a skilled soldier welding a sharp saber. The child will wildly flail the sword around as if he knew what he was doing, but even if he should strike a blow, it would do little harm because the blade is dull. He is unskilled and ineffective. The soldier, on the other hand, has trained himself by constantly practicing the fine art of swordsmanship until he is able to wield the sword skillfully. Also, he has taken the time to sharpen his blade so he can easily wound his opponent. He is skilled and effective because of his constant training and use. The question we each need to ask ourselves then is “Which one am I?” You see, learning to discern good from evil, learning to hear God’s voice clearly, and growing spiritually in the things of God does not happen automatically. We cannot allow ourselves to be lazy, but we must discipline ourselves and develop spiritual habits that will train us to use our “swords” (the Word of God) effectively. I would suggest the following: 1) Develop a daily habit to read the Word of God. But don’t just read it. Get into the habit of asking God to speak to you through the passage you are reading. Listen for His voice and write down in a notebook what He is revealing to you. 2) Then, put what God said to you into practice right away. This is how we “sharpen our blade”. Learning how to pray, prophecy, and be sensitive to the prompting of the Holy Spirit requires practice so ask the Holy Spirit for guidance and strength to do what the Lord is directing you to do. And 3) Teach others. The author of Hebrews chastised the believers because they were not spiritually mature yet to mentor someone else. This is what we all should be doing (Matt. 28:19-20) however, few of us are obeying that commandment. I would encourage you to ask God to show you someone whom you can help as they learn to develop their own spiritual habits and become skilled soldiers with sharpened blades.